If you've photographed more than a handful of first birthdays then chances are you’ve felt my pain. Every now and then I get a one year old that’s just a bit shy and needs some time to get used to a potentially overwhelming situation. The kiddo is very tentatively checking out it’s new environment full of bright colors and new people. Meanwhile, mom and dad are jumping around like over-caffeinated spider monkeys. They (the spider monkeys) are both yelling for the child to look at them even though they’re on opposite sides of the room. The little one gets over stimulated, confused, and then breaks down and screams bloody murder. Five minutes into the photo shoot, it’s off the rails. What do you do?

Insist on a consultation.

This is the number one thing that has saved me from impatient, overbearing stage moms and dads. The appointment itself serves as a gatekeeper because the types of people that tend to be overbearing on set will do anything to not have to make this seemingly useless appointment. Every time we skipped the consultation and went straight to the shoot we ended up hiding at least one of the parents behind a reflector (whoops!) or rescheduling because the child couldn’t stand the chaos. So take my advice: make a pre shoot consultation mandatory and stick to your guns. Don’t let anyone skip out on it because in my experience, you will be sorry.

I love consultations: this is your chance to explain how you work.

People need to know what's going on or they get nervous. When your clients are on set they have no idea how things work. They don’t know where to start or stand, and they have no idea what to do to create the best portraits. This is when people with really “outgoing” personalities will try to run the show because they can’t handle not knowing what’s going on. The consultation is your chance to spell out how you want to approach the smash cakes session. This is where you determine what first birthday ideas and cake smash outfits you’ll be using and in what order. Parents will appreciate this because they can become more involved in the process and help you get the best photos possible of their little one.

Use the consultation to assess the child's comfort level with strangers

During the consultation I insist that I get to meet the child. I bring in toys and get down on the floor and play with them. Some kids are super outgoing and immediately start playing, while others tend to be more shy. Knowing how the child reacts to strangers helps me determine how fast I bring the energy level up during our shoot. With my first birthday babies I start slow, allowing the child to get used to their environment and then raise the energy level based on how much time the child needs to get comfortable. This is one of those things that is vital to discuss with the parents BEFORE the session. Otherwise your parents will assume you’re just being lazy or you suck at your job and then you get the spider monkeys I mentioned earlier. 98% of the parents understand and appreciate this conscientious approach to photographing their child and thank me for taking the time to explain it.

Talk about what products you’ll be shooting for.

In every consultation we always ask the question “what products will we be shooting for?” Most of the parents haven't really thought about products. Getting them to think about it helps in a lot of different ways. It gets the parents used to your pricing. There is nothing worse than client suffering from sticker shock in your sales room. Everyone involved has invested a ton of time in these portraits and if a photography client can’t afford your pricing it is extremely frustrating for them and for you.

The second way is it helps them understand why you need to take the same shot from different angles. If the client wants an album I try to take full body shots, ¾ shots, and close ups in every outfit on every background. This can be super frustrating to a type A client who wants to “hurry this up”. If they understand that you need multiple angles to make the very best looking portrait album possible, they usually give you the time you need to get it done.

The last way it helps applies to the parents who want to constantly check the back of your camera. I have no problem letting mom and dad have a peek at the images on the back of the camera. Sometimes they don't understand why I leave so much room around the edges of the photo. If we’ve talked about creating canvases I just simply remind them that I need to leave extra space because the sides of a canvass will be wrapped around the edge of the frame. Addressing these types of concerns with solid information will help the client see you as the professional you are.

on The day of the shoot, repeat yourself

On the day of the shoot take the first 10 minutes to go back over all the details. Remind them that you’ll be starting slow and bringing up the energy. Go over what sets and outfits you’ll be using and in what order. Go over the products you’ll be shooting for and how you’ll need to take the images to create the best possible finished products. This will cut down on the nervous energy your client is feeling by letting everyone know what's coming next.

The BONUS

If you follow the steps above it will go a long way to helping you control the photo shoot on the big day. But, if keeping your sanity intact is not enough reason to try these techniques then I'm happy to tell you that there are some additional amazing side effects for insisting on a consultation.

You become the expert

There are a ton of photographers out there and your client may assume that you are simply one of the masses. By taking the time to consult with your client before the big day, you are setting yourself apart from the pack. Follow that up with clearly outlining your process and openly discussing your pricing and now you are truly a professional in the eyes of your client.

You get cooperation

When you have a plan, you take away any doubt that you don’t know what you’re doing. You're in charge and by taking the lead you make your client feel more comfortable. When your client knows what you’re doing and why, it’s easier to involve them in the creative process. When they get involved it’s more fun for everyone on set and enhances the clients’ experience. Don’t forget your job is not only to create great images, it’s also to create a experience that they’ll remember.

You’re increasing your sales average

By asking you clients what products you’ll be shooting for you’re planting the idea of creating something other than just digital copies of the photos. You’re pre-selling product without being slimey or pushy. When you’re on set and you remind them that because they were thinking about canvases you’re going to shoot the next series a little wider, you’re reminding them that they actually wanted canvas. In the sales room you won’t ask if you if they “want a canvas” you simply need to ask “which canvases” would they like.

Your littlest clients have a good EXPERIENCE

The most important side effect of having a consultation before the shoot is you get to give the child the best possible experience. It’s easy to get caught up in sales averages and creating images that will make the photographer down the road jealous. But please don’t forget that a cake smash session should always be an amazing experience for your little clients. By insisting on a consultation you get a chance to meet the child prior to the shoot and this helps you determine the best way to approach photographing the child. This is going to ensure that the birthday boy or girl has the best experience possible.

In the end, a smooth client experience from start to finish is all about clear communication. The consultation is your first chance to establish that line of communication and position yourself as the respect-worthy professional you really are.

Thanks for reading guys I know this was a bit of a long one.

- Daniel

What are your thoughts about consultation? Do they help your studio or do you think they’re a waste of time? Let me know what you think in the comment section below.

Your Best Weapon Against Pushy Parents (The Consultation)